Oh Daughter.

Ev has been a bit mixed up lately. She just isn't herself. We have been having some sleep issues, some mouthy issues, some control issues and some fear issues. I am trying to be patient. I think that what she is going through is after-affects of such a big upheaval.
The move went smoothly and I really though we may have made it through without too many issues but I think Ev is a bit like me, in that she falls apart after things settle down.

She is usually ready to jump at the chance to go outside. Not so much anymore. She just wants to stay in and read or be in her room all alone. She says that she's afraid of bugs and we have had a few reaaaally looooong nights where she was exhibiting some pretty serious obsessive thoughts about bugs. And by nights, I mean three a.m. kind of nights. Then we have had these weird 4- 5 am  wake-ups where she doesn't go back to sleep unitl 7 am or so, then back up for the day at 8 am. She has also been incredibly mouthy and argumentative. I am not even going to bore you with descriptions of her incessant bossing of, and fussing at, Liam- it's insane. Or how she tries to interject herself into the whole "Parenting of Liam" thing.


I am flat out exhausted.
I know that she must be.

We have tried to be understanding but not let her get away with ugly behavior and we have used very gentle corrections. We have tried to talk to her about her feelings- she shuts us down. We have used every thing we have to try and help her but I think we may have to sit back and wait to see what shakes out. I hug her and kiss her and hold her as much as she will let me. I go out of my way to tell her lots and lots of times how I love her and that she's a great kid.
She says that she is not afraid of her room and she does spend alot of time in there - all alone with her door shut. So I believer her on that front.

Ultimately I think she just got incredibly tired and strung out and the move rattled her quite a bit. I am wondering though- if she isn't working some adoption thing out in her heart and mind?
She will talk to me- eventually. It's just that when she talks to me, she will have struggled all on her own to the point where she is on the verge of a solution or to the point that she is so confused and hurt that she just can't do any more work on her own. These are the times when it is the hardest to have such an independent child- you want to help, you CAN help but they just can't let you.

The Smokewood Gang will be here for a visit on Wednesday. Maybe seeing that her family can get here will help settle her mind. Maybe she will talk with Grandma or Grandpa or Lissa....I don't know. I feel so helpless.

Maybe she's just seven.