What I Will Tell Them

Tonight we sat on the beach to watch fireworks.
We got there early so the kids could romp and play in the sand and surf. And romp they did. Les and I sat on a blanket and talked of everything and nothing. Les walked Ev down to where she thinks the mermaids come up to brush their hair. Liam fell and fell and fell in the small breakers that come off the bay. We had the last few bits of taffy that I had been saving for  just the right time.
The fireworks came and went just as the crowd did. Still, we sat there on the beach, in the night, the four of us. We sat watching the sea and listening for the song of mermaids.
Because she was worried about tiny crab like things that were crawling out of the sea and because she was worried about her beloved pink flip flops getting washed away, Ev crawled into my lap. Because she was tired, she stayed there and let me wrap my arms about her.
And we began to talk she and I, as the boys sat nearby doing their own thing.
I talked to her about when she was Liam's age and we lived in Hatteras and we went to the beach and she got cold, and how I zipped her into my jacket and how, that was the first night in her life she had ever noticed the stars. I told her how she sat there with just her head poking out of my jacket and how she whispered "Zars! Zars Mama!" over and over again. I told her how we used to walk to the beach and tell the waves of our troubles and how the waves would carry those troubles to King Neptune and how he would lock them up in a sea trunk at the very bottom of the ocean. I told her other things as well, so many little stories about her and how I have loved her.
And because she needed to hear these things, she sat and listened with her head resting back on my shoulder and a wary eye on her shoes.
And I wondered about a night in our future. Maybe a night very similar to tonight and I wondered what I would tell her.
I hope that I will remember to tell her how she had to pee in the water, how she laughingly dumped sand all over her brother's head, how she was so worried about her shoes. I hope I remember to tell her what it felt like to sit there, on the sand, with those bright blossoms of light going off in the night sky and her by my side. She and Liam, all huddled under a damp and sandy towel and resting back on me. I hope to remember to tell her how her Papa peeked over my shoulder and then he too leaned on me for a bit and how that felt, to have them all there, with me in the night. I want to tell her about who she is right now: Two loose teeth, hair that smells of sun and wind and salt water, 22 mosquito bites, long, tanned legs, that she was 7 years old but wearing a size 3T swim suit, that she fit so perfectly into my lap, that I dropped my arms once from around her and she whispered, "you can still squeeze me if you need to", that she sat and Imagined the castle that King Neptune would live in and that it was the most fabulous castle anyone could have thought of. I will remind her that she believed in fairies and mermaids. I will remind her of how knowing that hermit crabs have blue blood makes her skin crawl.
 I will remind her that I loved her this night. This night and all the nights before and all the nights to come.
Yes. That's what I will tell her. I will tell her about the love.

And what will I tell Liam?
That it was his first July 4th. That with the very first firework, he flung up his fat baby arms and yelled happily at the sky, that he clapped and laughed. I will tell him how he ran to the water and hurled himself into the breakers and how he would take a direct hit in the face yet gasp and laugh and look for more. I will tell him how he sat on Papa's lap and looked out to the sea in the night and sang his little heart out. I will tell him how he became so overcome tonight, that he stood up and just HAD to kiss his Papa. I will tell him how he looked riding home in the car, wrapped in a beach towel and talking tired nonsense and made his sister nuts. I will tell him how he said " Ah Oh OO Mama" as I told him good night.
And it seems there will be love to tell him about as well. This boy of ours. Our little savage. The one that is a continual surprise. I will tell him how I am so glad, so very glad that he was with us this night.