And Now It's Time to Rest

"We don't need another cat. So don't feed those cats anything." Those were the words uttered by my husband on a beautiful late Spring day on Cape Hatteras in 2007 when I pointed out a mama cat and her litter of four orange tiger kittens in our back yard. I promptly ignored him, fed the cats so they would stick around and I could get to know them and decide which one (or two) would be mine.

The next afternoon, another island stray, a big male, a bully, came through our yard and started picking on the kittens. I can't stand a bully, be it man or beast. I ran outside and without thinking, picked up this completely wild, orange kitten that was around 4 months old. The kitten had probably never been that close to a person before, let alone been held. He immediately relaxed, looked me in the face and chirped at me. I scared off the bully cat, carried the kitten to my porch and fed him until he couldn't walk. I noticed he was a polydactyl. I noticed he was very handsome. I also noticed that he was friendly and verbal. My husband was doomed.

I tried to get the other kittens as well but they weren't interested. A few days later, they did come back and another kitten went home with my friend Lynnette, but that is another story.

This kitten still had to audition for my husband and man, did he out on a show! Flopping at his feet, chirping and burbling. Winding around his legs. Making a general scene. There was no resistance. We picked him up and brought him in the house in less than two minutes. He looked around the house, jumped up on the couch and fell asleep for 13 straight hours- he knew he was home. He didn't even sniff around. While he was sleeping we decided to name him Billy Bones and he was a descendant of the shipwrecked pirate cats on the island and he should have a good pirate name.

I knew almost instantly that he was going to be a "cat among cats". He had personality plus! He was into everything, all of the time. He was right in the middle of everything that was happening, he did not want to be left out of anything. At the same time, he was patient and good natured, he let little Evelyn do anything she wanted to him, I can not tell you how many times, she was his "patient" as she played Doctor or Vet. 

And so began many, many years of life with Billy Bones. One adventure after the next. He became my cat really. I was his person, though he loved us all and had a special kind of relationship with everyone in the family. For instance, he only would nose boop with Papa, he only tolerates head kisses from Ev, he likes to be lounging on me or touching me at all times. If we are playing board games, he has to be on the table with us. He is a hunter and a killer, in one day he killed and  ate 3 rabbits (that is a record). He has hunted and eaten: rabbits, squirrels, birds, lizards, snakes, moles, voles and skinks. having a party? he will right out in the middle of things. Trying to sleep? He wants to be right on your face. He would talk to you, using this cross between a meow and a chirp.  He once cleared an entire neighborhood of the vole/mole problem! No kidding- our neighbors were delivering us plates of cookies in thanks because Billy was such a big help to them. He knew when you were sick and he would lay by you and offer you comfort. He once walked though wet paint and tracked that all though the house! Nothing on any mantle was ever safe from him. 

He loved to be outside but HATED for his 23 toes to get snow or water in them. He loved to be on the hunt or to have some poor live creature to be stalking. He loved to snuggle on the fuzzy brown blanket at night on your lap while you watched tv. He loved to try and eat your yarn while you crocheted. He had the softest, silkiest fur that he was completely vain about. His tail had a mind of its own- he could be sound asleep and you could call his name and that tail would nearly swish off of his body. 

Then one day, I noticed a lump on his left back leg. It turned out to be a very rare thing. A Vaccine Induced Fibrocarcoma. A nasty, aggressive cancer that has a poor prognosis. We decided to keep him as happy and as comfortable as we could, for as long as we could. That's what we did. We loved our little cat, beyond comprehension. He filled our lives to the absolute brim with fun, joy, love and life. I am not sure I will ever meet another cat like Billy Bones. Today we realized that he had fought long enough. That it was time to let him rest. He had given all he could, he had chased his last rabbit. 

He left this world purring, wrapped in his fuzzy brown blanket and surrounded by the people that loved him most. We are shattered and heartbroken but, in time we will come to realize that beyond this loss we have been given a most precious gift- the friendship and love of a most extraodinary cat. 

Changing Definitions

We were watching  the new Netflix series, Lost in Space, the other night. The five of us all lounging about on various soft surfaces, some of us covered in blankets, some not. Four of us are human, one feline. The title of the show was "Eulogy" and the daughter piped up and asked us what a eulogy was.
We gave her the definition: a speech or piece of writing that praises someone or something highly, typically someone who has just died.
The feline snuggled in so comfortably on my lap for the evening's viewing happens to be a very valued member of this little society. He also happens to be dying of cancer. He is fading fast and soon he will leave the realm of our little world and join the larger cosmos where he can chase baby rabbits and lizards until his heart's delight. For now, however, he is tired and waning and we spend every moment we can making sure that he is assured of his supreme position in the hierarchy of this family.
Why should we wait until someone dies before we decide it is time to pronounce aloud, for the world to hear all of the things that we love about them, the things that we admire, the things that make them special? Maybe we can start changing the very definition of the word eulogy itself to mean something a little different, something that reminds us to cherish those around us just a little bit more, to be a bit kinder, to have a little more patience, to touch more softly, speak more gently and to sit on the couch just a few minutes longer and listen to that precious rattling purr.

A Status Update Is In Order

Things around here are happening. Lots of things. Too many things. Too fast. Sometimes I can't catch my breath. The Coast Guard is moving us from Florida to Michigan, we have to sell a house to get there, we have two kids in two different sports, Les is still on his regular Underway schedule with his Cutter , plus he will need to fly out for a "school"(not a complaint, just a statement of fact as his absences can add to the crazy), Billy Bones has been diagnosed with cancer and is not doing well, two more holidays in Florida before the move, Homeschooling two kids- one in elementary, one in middle-school and, just to keep things fun,  I had a Total Abdominal Hysterectomy in January closely followed by the flu that was coupled with bronchitis and sinusitis.

We were expecting the move but they are still hard. Sometimes you feel like you are just settling in to a location and it is time to pick everything up and move on again. This time we are leaving behind a home that we all truly love, we have friends that we care about and man, do we love the weather in February. We are selling this house too, which adds a whole new level of stress. In all of our previous moves, we rented, so we really didn't have to worry over the timeline as much as we are this move. Also? Why does no one ever talk about what a pain showing your house is during a sale? it's about to kill our family slob (Liam for those of you that couldn't guess). The fact that he actually, really and truly, literally has to keep his room clean causes him physical agony.

Billy Bones our wonderful cat of almost eleven years, was diagnosed with cancer a few months ago. It's a VERY rare kind of cancer that is called a Vaccine Induced Fibrosarcoma. this cancer makes very nasty tumors that grow fast and aggressively along nerve paths. Apparently even for this type of cancer, Billy's is aggressive. Like, it's the Hulk of this kind of thing. At this point he's not doing that great. We can tell that he is in some pain, he is sleeping 16-20 hours a day, or if not sleeping just dozing or laying there as still and quiet as he can. He only eats about once or twice a day. He still walks around the lanai, he still comes out to sit with us. He still burbles and chirps at us, he purrs. But, I am not sure how much more time we have with our little guy.

Liam is in Little League this season again. He loves it this year more than ever. He really has a head for the game and knows where the ball should go, he follows the game well. After tonight's game, he was totally creased that the Ump called him out at home when he KNEW he was safe. It was like a scene out of Bull Durham. Ev is playing Soccer. She just started her season, her first game is this Saturday. She is very excited to have a female Coach that she really likes and she has lots of girls on her team that she knows. I think it will be a fun season for her.

Homeschooling has been a bit hit or miss since my surgery. I have been trying to get us all back on track but some days I feel completely overwhelmed and intimidated. Other days I am a complete Rock Star. I guess that's how it goes.  Liam is doing so great, his reading is really coming along, it's amazing. He also just gave his first report (it was oral) in History, the subject was Pirates (we let him choose the subject) and we were sore amazed at how well he did! Ev has been working very hard in her math and in her Mandarin studies with Les. I am always amazed at her writing, I need to give her more assignments in that area so she can hone her skills. We are working on a Biology Unit and I am trying to tailor it between the two of them- that is a challenge.

I had to have the TAH because I have a history of some issues, including Polycystic Ovary Syndrome and I also had some fibroid that were giving me issues. My providers her are top notch, just all around great Doctors that truly care and listen and so we all thought it was time that I have the surgery. I have never been pregnant or given birth, so with my PCOS diagnosis, my chances of getting cancers in the female reproductive organs were very high. I had been asking various Doctors for a hysterectomy for at least 10 years but no one would do it. So, finally, all my dreams of surgical menopause have come true. Yes, Virginia, menopause is as fun as you've heard.

So that's what's happening. We are busy and happy even if we are a bit stressed. We are sad about Billy but we will make sure he is loved until his last moment with us and we will not let him suffer. And come hell of high water we will all end up in Michigan.